Enough

We had a harrowing Target experience the other night.  On our way in the store I told the girls if they could be good, they would get a little treat on the way out.  Well, they did a great job behaving and when it came time to check out, they reminded me of my promise. However, they waited until my items were being scanned by the gracious Target employee before running towards the candy.  As they go running, I try to scoop JJ up in my arms and shield him from the whereabouts of his sisters because he loves candy.  I don't mean he is a casual fan of candy.  I mean he LOVES candy, in any shape or form he can get it.  It was very near his bedtime, and I, thinking I'm being a responsible mother denied him.  As the girls go sprinting for the candy, I was able to distract him, until....until Madelyn twisted her ankle in her rush and started screaming at the top of her lungs.  This of course demanded JJ's immediate attention.   As he broke free from me, he realized the object of the girls pursuit....CANDY.  This is all happening while I'm paying (I wasn't about to make the people behind me wait!).  Jason is dealing with Madelyn as I finish up, as I go over and get the Lifesaver gummies out of JJ's hand and grab him kicking and screaming, candyless away from the scene.  I stealthfully one handedly, pay for the girls candy choices and hand them to a limping, still tearful Madelyn.  All the while holding JJ's head far away from my own so that I don't get a fat lip in this amazingly loud, flailing tantrum.   As Jason and I are giving each other the "we will never bring this child in a store, ever, ever again" look, I couldn't help hearing a gentle whisper from God....  

I was thinking and processing the situation as I strapped a still screaming baby boy into his carseat, wondering how many times I have had a reaction like this when I didn't get something that I wanted from God.  See, I knew that the candy tasted good, and of course so did JJ.  He was also aware that his sisters got candy and I know was wondering what was up with that.  But what I understood that he did not, was that it was about to be bedtime, and really, should a 19 month old be eating that junk anyway?? It wasn't good for him, and even though I knew it, he didn't understand. Sometimes I WANT things.  God has reminded me though, lately in fact, that some times enough is....well, enough.  What we want may not be best; it may hurt us in the end rather than benefit us.  JJ won't understand this for awhile, but even though I hate to see my baby boy cry over something that he desperately wanted, I knew best.  I was probably 18 before I fully wrapped my brain around that concept, but what I know now is that God knows best.  He loves us enough to protect us, and sometimes that means protecting us from ourselves, and the desire for things that aren't good for us.

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